Lets file this under, Fuck This, Fuck U!!!!!!

Look I know I make misteaks and this being a big one. U have no fucking right to tell me what I regret and what I don't, so FUCK U!!!!!! I already know this tiny bits of info that you are saying and trust me so does everyone else so again fuck you Captain Obvious. I do hate myself for what I did dispite whether or not I got played. I wish it had never fucking happened. So you don't need to point a fucking finger when you got 3 pointing right back at yourself. And why don't you quit being a fucking pussy and actually stand up for what you are saying because obviously u are chicken shit to take that stand because you post anonymously. We all know what is going on so you don't have to make obvious fucking comments about my life. Everyone gets shit on once in their life and just so happen I did. Big fucking deal. I deal with it and I get over it so you need to too.

WHY?????????

Y AM I CONSTANTLY PLAGUED WITH HAVING TO KNOW "WHY"!?!?! Y DO PPL SAY SOME THINGS, Y DO PPL DO THE THINGS THEY DO-----OFCOURSE IM TALKIN ABOUT THE NASTY THINGS PPL SAY AND DO. I HAVE DONE SOME RESEARCH ONLY TO FIND OUT THAT SOME THINGS I HAVE BEEN TOLD R SEEMINGLY LIES AND BULLSHIT. I HAVE FOUND OUT THAT PPL U LOVE AND CARE ABOUT AND GIVE URSELF TO COMPLETELY CAN AND WILL EASILY REPLACE U WHEN UR NOT LOOKING, BUT ONLY TO MAKE NICE TO UR FACE........AND FOR WHAT?!?!? Y?!?!? WHATS THE MOTIVE, THE INTENTIONS, THE REASON FOR FUCKIN WITH SOMEONE LIKE THAT?!?!? IS THERE REALLY A NEED FOR IT? SERIOUSLY, IF UR JUST OUT TO HAVE A FLING THEN FUCKIN SAY IT, OR IF UR NOT LOOKIN FOR A RELATIONSHIP THEN FUCKIN SAY IT. IF U DONT KNOW WHAT IT IS THAT U WANT THEN U SHOULDNT B TRYIN TO DATE ANYWAYS CAUSE THEN UR JUST FUCKIN WITH THE OTHER PERSONS HEAD!!!! ITS NOT THAT HARD OR COMPLICATED!!!! U EITHER LIKE SOMEONE OR U DONT. U EITHER WANT TO B WITH THAT PERSON OR U DONT. U EITHER WANT TO HURT THEM OR U DONT. UR EITHER HONEST OR UR NOT. SO IM SURE EVERYONE CAN GATHER THAT I HAVE BEEN PLAYED YET AGAIN!!!!-----AND NOW MY HEART IS BREAKING. THE LIES, THE BULLSHIT, THE DISHONESTY, THE NOT KNOWING WHAT THE INTENTIONS WERE OR R, THE FUCKIN CONFUSION AND THE FUCKIN WANTING/NEEDING TO KNOW "WHY". GRRRRRRRR!!!! AND NOW THERES THE FUCKIN WAITIN WHILE HIS PANSY ASS FUCKS AROUND SOME MORE....RUNNIN AROUND IGNORING THE SITUATION UNTIL HE DECIDES TO GROW A PAIR OF FUCKIN BALLS AND STEP UP TO SAY WHATS ON HIS MIND. NOT THAT IT FUCKIN MATTERS CAUSE ITLL PROBABLY ALL B BULLSHIT ANYWAYS-----ISNT THAT WHAT PLAYERS DO? ISNT THAT WHAT THEY R GOOD AT? YEP. AND SO IT IS-----TASHA GETS SCREWED OVER AGAIN B/C SHE WEARS HER HEART ON HER SLEEVE. WOO FUCKIN HOO FOR ME!!!! SO WHATS WORSE.....THE FACT THAT I LET IT HAPPEN OR THAT HE PLAYED THE GAME???? EITHER WAY IM NOT SURE IF I WANNA BAWL MY EYES OUT KICK MY OWN ASS OR GO KICK HIS.

Who are you?

Look, I appreciate everyones comments that are made. One in particular really gets to me though. The last comment on "All board the Douchbag Express". I understand the meaning. I have heard that several times growing up. But I will have you know that I am not like that with everyone. Everyone makes misteaks and it just so happens that I am paying for mine now instead of later. I hate myself for doing it don't get me wrong. There is not a day that goes by that I wish that I had never have done the things that I have done with him. But I can't change things now. I know that. I will get over it and soon. I am working on it and I have met someone that I enjoy being around but nothing is definate. I learn from my misteaks and this is one lesson that is taken to heart, literally.

HOLIDAYS......

SO I HOPE EVERYONE ENJOYED XMAS. I HAVE BEEN VISITED ALOT BY MY X, WHICH I APPRECIATE CONSIDERING THE CIRCUMSTANCES. OFCOURSE CHICA HAS CALLED TO CHECK IN AND I DID GET A PHONE CALL TODAY FROM ANGIE......BUT I DIDNT NEED TO B OCCUPIED BY MINDLESS CONVERSATION----I DO APPRECIATE THEIR EFFORTS........I JUST NEEDED SOMEONE TO B HERE, NOT NECESSARILY TALK AND MY X DID JUST THAT. HE ALSO HELPED SHOVEL ME OUT FROM THAT MASSIVE SNOW STORM!!!! ITS GOOD TO KNOW THAT HES AROUND WHEN SEEMINGLY THERES NO ONE ELSE. HE TOLD ME AGAIN THAT HE LOVES ME AND I HAVE BEEN LEFT WITH THE FEELING THAT THIS WHOLE TIME WAS JUST A MATTER OF CONVENIENCE. MAYBE ITS CAUSE THIS HOLIDAY SEASON HAS BEEN ESPECIALLY SAD AND LONELY FOR ME THAT FOR SOME REASON I STARTED THINKIN SHIT.........I REALLY DONT KNOW. I FEEL CONFUSED OVER ALOT OF THINGS AND IM THINKING-----NOW WHAT? I FEEL LIKE SOMETIMES MY BEST EFFORTS GO TO WASTE, ITS LIKE Y DO I EVEN TRY???????????????

HATER? ME?

Look ppl, I was basing my post on how I have been treated and how siciety sees things. I don't dislike skinny chicks. I have plenty of skinny size 5 friends. I was just stating that it is fucked up on how ppl think beauty should be and most of them think it is only skin deep. However, I do appreciate the comments. Like Tasha said, no need to be assholes. The truth hurts, I know.

P.S I am don't a dumb blonde. As a matter of fact, I am not blonde at all. So you can take that comment and shove it up your ass!

Beauty?

What the fuck ppl! Look I know that everyone person has their own idea of beauty but why do bigger women get such a bad rep? There are a lot of beautiful thicker women out there and they are not getting the respect they deserve and thats shit. I am a bigger girl and I am sure there are plenty of ppl who find my attractive, atleast I haven't had any complaints thus far but because I am that bigger girl I can not be seen as beautiful or attractive because of those few extra pounds. WTF!!!!! How come the majority of ppl are so fucking superficial? Can anyone answer this? Not everyone can not be an ignorant size 5 with breast implants. Sometimes bigger women surprize you men when you do take that chance and cross that "what is beautiful line". We know how to love and treat someone. We can be awesome lovers. Intelligent women. We can cook, clean, take care of ourselves and or man. Not saying that you skinny women can't. I am just saying, never trust a skinny cook and a girl with an always came and get it look. We have a lot to offer a man. As a matter of fact, I have talked to plenty of guys and I know what they look for a woman but what they want it in is the skinny girl. They could have their "everything I need woman" sitting right in front of them but because she has the pounds she will never be found. Is their someone out there that is brave enough to answer these questions? Is your ego your pride so big that you can date a bigger girl? Are you ashamed to admit it?

ALL ABOARD THE DOUCHBAG EXPRESS!!!!!

Lets face it, anymore you make my stomach contents curdle like spoiled milk. To think of you is like an ultimate brain freeze because you are so cold. Its constantly raining around me, the wind blows that coldest winds, its constantly winter, and slick as ice. I thought that falling for you was a good idea because we both know what its like to be burned. I thought for once in my life I could find out what love truly was and that this feeling wouldn't be wrong. I was wrong. You are a liar, you cheat me out of kindness and affection, you play me like a fiddle, and you have no respect for anyone not even yourself. You laugh because you know its true. You take advantage because you want people to hurt like you. You can't be honest with yourself and that leads you to the lies. Your pathetic soul you try to hide. I tried to do things out of kindness for you, I was there to listen when you wanted to speak. I put up with some lame sex to where it has gotten to the point that I am not sure whether or not I can tell the difference between a real orgasm or not. I have had such high regards for you and respected your oppion and yet you do nothing but shut me down. You have one of the ugliest hearts I have ever seen. You touch, your kiss could send a person into hypothermia. You words, the lies could penetrate a persons heart and have it shatter into many pieces like glass. Why do you do others this way? Why can't anyone, not only you, be honest with anyone? Why do we feel like hiding each others feelings is benefiting the other person? Why do people lie to cover up the truth? I think its because the feel they can't handle the truth not the other person. They don't want the guilt on their minds. I am ready to tell all again and again. I want to love you, I want this whole thing to be a lie and be given the respect that I deserve. I am not asking you for a relationship. I am just asking you to see me more than our quote unquote relationship and realize that I am not just a good lay. I am not putting myself on a high horse with that last statement but lets face it we have been doing our thing for other a year and something is going right. I am done as of my last and final phone call I make whether I get you or your voicemail and of this post. Its your choice. Can you step up and be a man? Or continue to be a pussy and trip over your own deception? I'm waiting.............................................................

ITS ALMOST CHRISTMAS!!!!!

WOW! I CANT BELIEVE CHRISTMAS IS NEXT WEEK!!!! I HOPE EVERYONE HAS THEIR SHOPPIN DONE, I KNOW I DO.....THANK GOD, CAUSE THE STORES R HORRIBLE. WELL THE RAT PACK HAS DECIDED TO HAVE A GET TOGETHER FOR XMAS JUST LIKE WE DID FOR T-DAY. I HOPE EVERYONE ELSE GETS TO SPEND THE HOLIDAYS WITH PPL THEY LOVE AND CARE ABOUT. U KNOW ITS FUNNY........THE HOLIDAYS BRING SUCH A MIX OF EXCITEMENT AND DREAD. LATELY THE ONES I LOVE HAVE BEEN GOIN THRU A ROUGH TIME AND I WISH THAT I HAD A MAGIC WAND TO MAKE IT ALL BETTER FOR THEM. WHILE I HAVE MY OWN HEARTACHE THIS YR MY HEART ACHES EVEN MORE FOR THEM. I DONT EVEN HAVE SOME INFINITE WISDOM TO SHARE. I GUESS THE BEST THAT I CAN DO IS TO LET THEM KNOW THAT IM HERE AND I CAN LISTEN. TRY TO FIND THE POSITIVE ADMIST THE CHAOS AND TO JUST TAKE EVERYTHING ONE BABY STEP AT A TIME. I WISH THAT THEIR LOVED ONES OR THE ONES THEY WANT TO LOVE COULD "C THE LIGHT" AND START BEHAVING IN A MORE LOVING MANNER. IF IT COUNTS FOR ANYTHING............I LOVE YA FOR ALL THAT U R, WITHOUT CONDITIONS AND WITHOUT EXPECTING U TO CHANGE. >BIG HUGS< IN THE MEANTIME I WANT EVERYONE TO STOP AND TAKE A MOMENT THIS YR TO APPRECIATE THE PPL THEY HAVE IN THEIR LIVES. TOO OFTEN WE TAKE FOR GRANTED THE LITTLE THINGS, EVEN THOUGH FAM AND FRIENDS R BY NO MEANS LITTLE. TELL THEM U CARE AND DONT JUST APPRECIATE THEM ON HOLIDAYS.......DO IT ALL YR ROUND. REMEMBER, THINGS DONT HAPPEN W/O A REASON AND THAT INCLUDES PPL BEING AROUND U.

SAME SHIT A DIFFERENT DAY.......

BLAH BLAH BLAH!!!! WHEN DID LIFE GET SOOO ROUTINE? U GET UP GO TO WORK COME HOME AND DO CHORES. I DO UNDERSTAND THAT IT IS SOMEWHAT EXPECTED AS U GET OLDER.......MOSTLY B/C U EVENTUALLY START RUNNING OUT OF "SPUNK" AND ALOT OF PPL END UP WITH FAMILIES OF THEIR OWN AND WELL I CANT COME UP WITH ANOTHER REASON. MAYBE B/C U C THE USELESSNESS IN RUNNING TO THE BARS AND GOIN OUT ALL THE TIME, BUT ISNT THAT WHAT WE CALL MATURITY? I DONT KNOW, BUT I HAD A PHONE CONVERSATION LAST NITE AND GOT THE IMPRESSION THAT THE IMPRESSION THAT I MADE WAS THAT OF A 40YR OLD WITH LIKE 6 KIDS AND W/E. I MUST ADMIT THAT I DO LIKE TO CHILL AT HOME ALOT. I DONT LIKE RUNNIN TO THE BARS AND CLUBS AND SUCH........QUITE FRANKLY I CAN SPEND MY MONEY ON BETTER THINGS, THAT AND IM NOT ONE FOR DRINKING REALLY. ONCE IN AWHILE IS AIGHT BUT EVEN THEN ID MUCH RATHER B DRINKIN AT HOME........SO IF I DO WANNA GO OUT ID MUCH RATHER B GOIN TO MAGIC MT. OR BOWLING OR IF ITS NICE, PUTT PUTT.........THINGS OF THAT NATURE. ;) THEN WE WERE DISCUSSING FIRST DATES AND MAKIN AN IMPRESSION............I SAID THAT ITS REALLY NOTHIN SPECIAL TO TAKE SOMEONE OUT CAUSE AS LONG AS U HAVE 20 BUCKS WHATEVER U DO CAN B FUN EVEN IF UR NOT EXACTLY ENJOYING THE COMPANY.......I MEAN HOW CAN U NOT HAVE FUN WHILE WATCHING A MOVIE IN A THEATER-----THERES NO TALKING!!!!! AND HOW COULD U NOT HAVE FUN AT MAGIC MT.!!!! FOR ME, ID MUCH RATHER DO SOMETHING THATS MORE MUNDANE AND HUMDRUM CAUSE IF WE CAN CLICK DOIN THAT THEN ITS GAURANTEED THAT ACTUALLY GOIN OUT AND DOIN SOMETHING WILL B FUN. BESIDES, U DONT ALWAYS HAVE THE MONEY TO GO OUT AND ITS WHEN UR STUCK AT HOME HAVING TO DEAL WITH EACH THAT SOMETIMES PROBLEMS COME UP. I WOULD RATHER KNOW UP FRONT, RIGHT AWAY THAT WHOEVER IT IS THAT IM GONNA B WITH CAN DEAL WITH US JUST BEING US-----KNOW WHAT I MEAN? MAYBE IM WEIRD, MAYBE THAT MAKES ME OLD BUT I THINK ITS A FAIRLY GOOD WAY TO APPROACH THIS DATING THING CAUSE I DONT LIKE WASTING MY TIME OR ANYONE ELSES!!!! WHAT DO U GUYS THINK?????????

I COULD FLOW...........

.................BETTER THAN U WAY BACK B4 I WAS SEMEN!!!! LMAO SOOOO IM WONDERING WHERE OH WHERE DONALDRDECHICO IS???????? IM SURE HES READ THE COMMENTS, HMMMMM. OH WELL NO SKIN OFF MY BACK, HOWEVER I AM ALSO WONDERING Y IT IS THAT HE NEVER MAKES AN APPEARANCE UNTIL WE R BEING SILLY ON HERE? HE NEVER COMMENTS ON ANYTHING WORTH HAVIN AN OPINION ABOUT?!?! AGAIN, OH WELL. ANYHOOOOOOO I WAS THINKIN ABOUT THE POPULATION TODAY AND Y SOME PPL SAY AND DO THE THINGS THEY DO......I KNOW ITS A NEVER ENDING CYCLE, AND IM PRETTY SURE ILL NEVER OFFICIALLY HAVE AN ANSWER BUT IT MAKES FOR GOOD CONVERSATION........I WANT TO KNOW WHAT IT MEANS TO TELL SOMEONE THAT U THINK THEY R COOL. DOES THAT MEAN U LIKE THE WAY THEY THINK? OR U LIKE THE WAY THEY BEHAVE? OR THEIR ATTITUDE? I DONT THINK I EVER TELL ANYONE THAT I THINK THEY R "COOL". MAYBE ITS JUST A GENERIC TERM.......I USUALLY TELL SOMEONE THAT, "HEY I LIKE THE WAY U THINK", OR I JUST SAY THAT I THINK THEY R A GREAT PERSON-----MEANING THE WHOLE PACKAGE IS KICKASS, IE>>>>>THEY R INTELLIGENT, FUNNY, KIND, BIG HEART, ETC. MAYBE USING GENERIC TERMS TO TELL SOMEONE HOW U FEEL ABOUT THEM OR WHAT U THINK OF THEM IS A CHEAP AND EASY WAY OUT TO AVOID LETTING EMOTIONS SHOW??? IM SURE WE R ALL GUILTY OF THIS SORT OF THING........JUST RANDOMLY PICKING A WORD TO TELL SOMEONE THAT WE LIKE WHO THEY R AND WHAT THEY R ABOUT INSTEAD OF BEING SPECIFIC. BUT THAT GETS INTO THE WHOLE MUSHY, SAPPY, OVER DONE EMOTIONAL SHIT........WHICH ISNT NECESSARILY A BAD THING, THERES JUST A PLACE AND TIME FOR IT----AND EVERYDAY IS NOT THE PLACE AND TIME FOR IT!!!! HAHAHA SO LET ME KNOW WHAT U THINK "COOL" MEANS AND ALL THE GENERIC TERMS THAT GO WITH IT..............

PS.............I NEVER FINISHED MY THING ON WHAT IT MEANS TO B OLD SO HERE IT IS: I THINK "OLD" IS HOW U MENTALLY AND PHYSICALLY FEEL. ITS NOT A # OR WHETHER OR NOT UR SICK OR FORGETFUL. I DONT THINK IT HAS ANYTHING TO DO WITH MATURITY, CAUSE LETS FACE IT IVE KNOWN SOME "ADULTS" THAT ACTED LIKE THEY WERE 2!!! AND TEENS THAT WERE MORE LIKE 40!!! I THINK "OLD" IS THE LIFE EXPERIENCE UVE HAD AND WHAT U CAME AWAY FROM IT WITH. ITS UR OUTLOOK ON LIFE AND WHAT TO DO WITH IT. ITS UR STATE OF MIND AND HOW U C URSELF. ...................OK, NOW IM DONE, GOT COMMENTS? U KNOW WHAT TO DO............

GIRLS TALK ABOUT THE BOOTY TOO!!!!!!!

Fella's fella's fella's!!! Do you know how to please your woman? Seriouly? Don't lie! Come now. Tell Doctor Chica......................... You are a damn lier! U want to know why? Because girls talk about the ass too! Thats right! If you don't please your woman its guarented that her friends are going to know. They will also talk about the good sex but the bad sex, oh shit, all your shit is bare. No punt intended. If you do not go down on your girl and she has asked for it, you can count on her faking the orgasm because she needs that soft clitoral simulation of a tongue that a finger or a penis can't accomplish! If you don't changed positions and its just a standard postion you can count on eyes rolling, a faked orgasm so good that you won't be able to tell if its real or not because she has to do it quite often because u fucking suck in bed, she has become a pro at faking "O"! Trust me, girls have friends and their friends have friends and so on and so on! If you are not very well endowed and you won't or can't do any of the above, u just might be a lost cause as far as sex goes. Come on guys, you talk a lot of game, now, lets back it up. Do some research, communicate with your girl or if you are not commited then do some extra reading because you do not have the yes and no's to back the theory up. A girl will only and could only be as adventurous as you are. If you are not willing to share what ya know and are not able to learn and expirement more, then you need to give up sex, save a girl a faked orgasm, and yourself the humiliation of your "PROBLEM"!

OOOOHHHHH BABY, THATS FUCKING COLD!!!!!!!

Ok ppl! Must of all of us masterbate! Right? Its relieves a lot of stress. But how do you did it? With what? I was doing some reading on the matter and ppl do some off the wall shit. Like carve penises out of potato's, fuck themselves with it, and then eat it. Some use toys, fingers, hands, feet, whatever gets them off. However, I read this thing about this person using a popcicle. A FUCKING POPCICLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Damn, thats cold. Now, I like to think that I am pretty knownlegdable about sex in general but this deffinatly topped that cake. I knew that some europeans like to urinate and deficate on others, if that isn't strange but a popcicle. Oh shit! The porn shop closed early that night uh? LMAO!!!!! Anyway, I wouldlike for everyone to voice their oppion and let me know what your likes and dislikes are, do's and don'ts. Don't be shy, be open minded, and lets have fun. Just consider me Doctor Chica, your local, uncertified, sex therapist! "Feeling good is just a, well, hummmm, whatever u prefer away!"

What Meat Is In Your Freezer?

What makes a person racist? Is it their preference on dating? Their attitude toward other races? Its a question that many of us ask and others oppions are respected on this. No one will be slautered for their oppion. Everyone understands that this is a touchy subject, so please be respectful the others! Thank you for you comments on the matter.

Hi, my name is Donaldrdechico, I am applying for the asshole position!

Dear Mister Donaldrdechico, we are pleased to inform you that we have enough assholes on board our company and we will not be needing your assistance. You do have all the requirements to be the perfect asshole, however we do not except applications from menstral vomit that was ACCIDENTLY, or as we like to call it "A BIG FUCKING MISTEAK", that was inpregnated by a drunken crackhead with misdirected sperm that connected with discharge that managed to stay due to the lack of soap and water. If you feel that you were misunderstood in your application please feel free to stick your oppions up your ass because, quite frankly, we don't give a damn! We hope find your purpose in life, or rather, your place, which is on a sheet or a dirty towel somewhere that is washed, rinsed, and released down a drain.

Thank You For You Interest,
Life In The Rat Pack INC.

DONALDRDECHICO........

LOOK MAN, DIDNT I TELL U LAST TIME THAT U WANTED TO SPEW SHIT THAT UR WORDS HAVE NO EFFECT ON ME. FUNNY HOW FOR SOMEONE THAT DOESNT LIKE WHAT WE HAVE TO SAY U CHECK THE SITE "EVERYDAY".....(UR WORDS)!!! FUNNY HOW U SEEM TO THINK WE'RE ALL INBRED AND LOST IN THE "DARK AGES" WHEN UR THE IGNORANT FUCK THAT NEVER SAYS ANYTHING FOR TALKIN ALOTA SHIT!?!?!? HMMM WHATS UP WITH THAT? DONT BOTHER TO ANSWER THAT CAUSE I DONT REALLY CARE. U KNOW Y UR A HATER??????? CAUSE UR JEALOUS!!!! U THINK U GOT SOMETHIN MEANINGFUL TO PREACH ABOUT ON UR SOAPBOX THEN FUCKIN BRING IT!!! TIL THEN..........UR NO MORE TO ME THAN A WASTE OF UR DADDYS CUM WAD!!!!!!

why the rat pack is so great

So today chica calls me at 11. And I was awake and she was like whoa and I was like whoa. And after I vent about a certain so and so and she talks about her need for ass, we start talking about dog's licking peanut butter off of fun places. She was like I don't want to put my dog through that and I was like well you should borrow someone else's dog then. And then I said that the person would be like what the fuck did you do to my dog?... yeah not a good thing to say around people you don't know. Got lots of looks for that one. That's why the rat pack is great we can talk about dogs helping you masterbate and cannabilism and how the whole world is assholes and we wanna kill them and we can tell each other to fuck off and we will all just sit there and laugh. I can't wait to be home lol

HELLOOOO OUT THERE?????

DAMN!!! IS ANYONE ALIVE OUT THERE, FOR FUCKS SAKE!!!! IVE RECENTLY DECIDED TO GIVE UP ON BEING A STNA AND BECOME A FULL FLEDGED WITCH. NOT BITCH W I T C H !!!!! I KNOW SOME OF U WILL THINK THERES NO DIFFERENCE THERE WHEN IT COMES TO ME, HAHAHAHA. U FUCKERS WILL GET URS!!! MMMMAHAHAHA I THINK THAT A WITCH IS MUCH MORE PROSPEROUS THAN GOIN TO THE GRIND EVERYDAY. LETS FACE IT I WONT HAVE TO PAY FOR UTILITIES CAUSE I CAN JUST USE MY MAGIC, I WONT NEED TO PAY FOR GAS CAUSE ILL HAVE MY BROOM STICK AND THERE WONT B A GROCERY BILL CAUSE ILL JUST MAKE W/E APPEAR B4 ME!! BUT HERES THE BEST PART.......IF U FUCK W/ME ULL HAVE REASON TO REALLY FEEL THREATENED AND IF U NEED SOMETHIN THEN ULL B MORE INCLINED TO SINCERELY KISS MY ASS TO GET IT. :) ANYHOO I HAVE MY FRIEND TIM TO THANK FOR THIS, IT WAS HIS IDEA........WOOHOO TIM!!!!! ON A MORE SERIOUS NOTE, I HAD A XMAS DECORATION ON MY FRONT DOOR AND IT WAS BROUGHT TO MY ATTENTION THAT IT WASNT THERE ANYMORE.....SEEMS ITS BEEN MISSING FOR A FEW DAYS NOW. WTF????? I AM THOROUGHLY PISSED OFF, WHILE I DID HANG IT AT MY OWN RISK OTHER PPL HERE HANG SHIT ON THEIR DOORS AND NOTHIN HAPPENS!!!! WHAT NON CHRISTMAS MOTHER FUCKER WOULD TAKE SOMEONES DECORATION???? THE POPULATION NEVER CEASES TO AMAZE AND DISGUST ME. UGH. THE QUEEN ICE BITCH IS OFFICIALLY RELEASED...............

NOBAMMAS.........

OK U FUCKTARD!!! I CANT BELIEVE U PUT THAT SHIT ON THERE! U REALLY THINK ITS OK TO UNPLUG FROM UR FRIENDS LONG ENOUGH TO BANG EM AND THEN ACT LIKE IT NEVER HAPPENED THE NEXT DAY!?!?!?!?!? TRUTH B TOLD IF THEY R REALLY UR FRIENDS U WOULDNT B ABLE TO UNPLUG FROM THEM LIKE THAT TO B ABLE TO FUCK EM. UD CARE TOO MUCH ABOUT THEM IN THE FIRST PLACE!! BESIDES IF UR THAT HARD UP TO GET SOME ASS MAYBE ITS TIME TO GET A DOLL???????? BUY A HOOKER?????????? RENT MORE PORN?????????? GIVE URSELF CARPAL TUNNEL?????????? THE CHOICE IS URS.........I DONT THINK HAVIN A FUCK BUDDY THATS ONE OF UR FRIENDS IS THAT SIMPLE. THE WHOLE POINT IN HAVIN A FUCK BUDDY IS SO THAT THERES NO STRINGS ATTATCHED. IF UR FRIENDS THERES ALREADY STRINGS ATTATCHED. WANNA FUCK BUDDY? GO TO A BAR AND PICK UP ONE OF THE ASSHOLES THERE, THEN UNPLUG, BANG UR BRAINS OUT AND GO ON UR MERRY FUCKIN WAY!!!!!!!!!!! ............................AND HOOCHIE MAMA, THANKS FOR BEING MY DICTIONARY :) :) :) :)

JUST A POST....

I C THAT NO ONE HAS POSTED RECENTLY AND WELL IM SICK OF LOOKIN AT THE SAME SHIT......I KNOW HOOCHIE MAMA IS STUDYING HER BUTT OFF FOR MID TERMS, EXAMS AND TESTS OF THAT NATURE SO I DONT EXPECT TO HEAR FROM HER ON HERE FOR AWHILE. AND CHICA.......WELL IM NOT SURE BOUT HER, MAYBE ITS CAUSE WE DONT HAVE ANYTHING SUPER EXCITING GOIN ON IN OUR LIVES RIGHT NOW. AFTERALL IT IS THE "HOLIDAY" SEASON AND LOTS OF PPL HAVE TURNED INTO MANIACS ON THE ROAD AND IN THE STORES. MOST R PREOCCUPIED WITH SHOPPING AND WRAPPING AND VISITING. I TEND TO AVOID THE ROAD AND STORES UNTIL AFTER THE SEASON AS MUCH AS HUMANLY POSSIBLE!! COENCIDENTLY(SP?) THE DRAMA HAS STOPPED FOR ME AND IM TICKLED PINK SO I CANT EVEN POST BOUT THAT. AS FOR THE GIRLS I THINK THEYVE GIVEN UP ON THEIR DRAMA AND R SIMPLY WAITING IT OUT..........I SAW TIM THE OTHER DAY, HE ISNT DOIN ANYTHING HORRIBLY EXCITING EITHER. BUT ISNT THAT THE LIFE OF A GROWN UP? WHEN DID WE GET OLD, ACTUALLY.....WHEN DID WE START ACTING OLD? THATS A GOOD QUESTION: WHAT IS OLD? IS IT A STATE OF MIND, IS IT A PHYSICAL CONDITION, IS IT LIFE EXPERIENCE, IS IT MATURITY, IS IT AGE? I DEFINITELY HAVE MY OWN OPINION BUT LEMME KNOW WHAT U THINK..............

I just don't know anymore.

So my best friend is engaged. I should be happy and all and give him my good wishes, but I can't. Yet I can't just walk away like nothing ever happened. I just... I really just don't know. I thought I was doing something, something to help. Somewhere along the way I fell in love and then there was a big mess. Never fall in love with people who are with someone else! And always look for the way he treats everyone else. Don't listen to the people who tell you y'all look so cute together.
How do you deal with the fact that you still love him, you are still in love with him, and you care about him alot and think that his fiance is the biggest bitch and he deserves more? So if I go between asshole and crying my eyes out you will know why. I don't think I can do the whole school thing right now.
I am not going to think about that or at least not in the front of my brain. I am going to think about my new car. You may have a ring on your finger bitch but I got a shiny new car! You don't even have a car and I am going to wait until I am sure no one else wants it before I even offer it to you. You are a self-centered bitch and I don't like them. I never have. If you don't want to SHOW me you care then you can just keep walkin.'. It ain't even that fucking hard but you don't. So I am going to treat you like fucking shit, but I mean like the fucking shit you treat me as. Get ready it is going to be one helluva ride. *evil grin* ALl those asshole days are getting focused on one self-centered bitch.

WITH THE GIRLS......

SO LAST NITE HOOCHIE MAMA AND I HUNG OUT W/CHICA. I SWEAR SOME OF OUR STRANGEST AND MOST DISGUSTING CONVOS HAPPEN WHEN WE'RE ALL PISSY!!! I AM ONLY GOIN TO MENTION ONE OR TWO THINGS WE TALKED ABOUT CAUSE I KNOW THEY WANT TO TELL Y'ALL STUFF TOO.......FOR STARTERS, WE TALKED ABOUT HOW THE KINDS OF FOOD WE EAT AFFECT THE WAY WE TASTE.......AND YES WE R REFERRING TO THE FOOD AT THE "Y"!!! MANDY AND I HAPPEN TO EAT ALOT OF GARLIC AND SHE SEEMS TO THINK THAT NOT ONLY DOES IT COME OUT OF UR PORES BUT DOES CHANGE THE TASTE OF OTHER THINGS, NOW I HAVE NEVER HEARD OF THIS, I HAVE NEVER GOTTEN ANY COMMENTS AS TO WHETHER OR NOT I TASTE LIKE GARLIC OR CHOCOLATE OR W/E THE CASE MAY B. IM NOT SO SURE THIS IS A SOLID THEORY OR NOT CAUSE I DO KNOW THAT W/GUYS IF U DRINK ALOT OF WATER OR MOSTLY WATER THINGS R A LIL SMOOTHER AND TASTE BETTER. AND IM NOT SO SURE THAT AN EXPERIMENT WOULD B IN ORDER, CAUSE IF ITS TRUE THEN WHO WANTS TO EAT SOME RAW GARLIC? THATS EXACTLY WHAT I THOUGHT!?!?! THEN WE DISCUSSED THE ISSUE OF HOW SOME FOODS CAUSE FLATULENCE MORE THAN OTHERS.........YES I KNOW, WE R ALL SICK, SOMETIMES I WONDER IF WE R TOO TESTOSTERONE INCLINED TO T/POINT THAT WE SEND OFF SOME SORT OF SIGNAL OR SMELL TO T/MALE POPULATION AND SCARE THEM AWAY!?!?! :) ANYHOO JUST SOMETHING TO THINK AND LAUGH ABOUT....... :) PS---GUYS I DONT WANT TO HEAR ANY STORIES IN UR COMMENTS ABOUT HOW CHICS TASTE OK, LETS NOT B TOO RAUNCHY!!!!! WE R TALKIN SCIENTIFICALLY/PHISIOLOGICALLY HERE!!!! :)

Posting More!

Okay so the title was me being an asshole. So chica and Miss Muffy would know that this is me posting more. First I am sorry that I don't I just get busy and since my life has so much drama I figured I would try to figure it all out. Yeah that ain't happening!
So before I forget, I am going to talk about somethings. First I hung out with tasha last night til like 4 in the morning making chirstmas decorations and then watching her decorate the tree. Now before you think I am a bad friend I offered to help. But Tasha has to do it her way... but she is cute so it is okay. She just didn't want me to hang my phallic symbol... I mean candle stick and holder in the front of her tree....lol. Really it was just nice to get to hang out with someone. People usually don't get that I need to just be around people sometimes.

T-DAY AND SHIT......

THANKSGIVING DINNER WENT OFF WITH A BANG. EVERYONE CAME AND HAD A GOOD TIME! AND THIS YEAR I DIDNT BLOW THE WINGS OFF THE BIRD! HAHAHA I GOT A SURPRISE VISIT FROM MY FAVE UNCLE AND AUNT FROM NC, SO THAT WAS REALLY NICE.......GOOD LIL PICK ME UP! I PUT UP WHAT XMAS DECORATIONS I HAD. TIM HELPED WITH MY TREE AND THE LIGHTS. I HAVE 1500 LIGHTS ON A 6FT TREE!! "PLANES PLS LAND HERE!" HAHAHA IT TOOK US ABOUT AN HOUR TO PUT THE DAMN THING UP CAUSE NONE OF THE BRANCHES WERE LABELED SO WE HAD SOME REARRANGING TO DO!! :) AND I ALSO DID A LIL MORE XMAS SHOPPING, GOD THE STORES R TERRIBLE! EVERYTHING HAS BEEN PRETTY CALM OTHERWISE, THANK GOD CAUSE IM SICK OF THE FUCKIN DRAMA GOIN ON RIGHT NOW! PPL BETTER GET A GRIP CAUSE IM ABOUT TO GO OFF, BUT IVE BEEN BITING MY TONGUE CAUSE SOME REALLY NASTY SHIT IS GONNA GET SAID AND ITS GONNA PUT SOME REALATIONSHIPS TO THE TEST. CONSIDER THIS EVERYONES FUCKIN WARNING............HAVE A FUCKIN LOVELY DAY!!!! :)

WOOHOO! SCHOOL IS OVER! :) NEEDLESS TO SAY I PASSED WITH A HIGH GRADE AND MY TEACHER GAVE ME A GREAT EVALUATION. (YEAH THATS RIGHT, IM A STUDMUFFIN ;) ) TOMORROW IS THE RAT PACK'S T-DAY DINNER, IM EXCITED TO HAVE EVERYONE AROUND TO SHARE GOOD FOOD AND A GOOD TIME! I HAVE SINCE TALKED TO VERSION 2 AND HE SAID HE WOULD COME.......BUT HE KEEPS TELLIN ME THAT HE'LL GET AHOLD OF ME AND THEN HE DOESNT. FOR SOME STRANGE REASON I FEEL LIKE IM GOIN TO GET STOOD UP FOR MY DINNER?!?! I HAVE BEEN DISAPPOINTED AND LET DOWN QUITE A FEW TIMES BY PPL IN MY LIFE, UD THINK THAT ID B USED TO IT BY NOW BUT IM NOT. IM HURT THAT HE TELLS ME HE WILL DO SOMETHING AND THEN DOESNT FOLLOW THRU---NOW I UNDERSTAND THAT SHIT COMES UP, BUT THIS SEEMS LIKE A BLATANT DISREGUARD FOR KEEPING HIS WORD TO ME. IM GETTING TIRED OF WAITING AND CONSTANTLY NOT KNOWING IF HES ACTUALLY GOIN TO GET AHOLD OF ME..............HOW HARD IS IT REALLY TO JUST DO WHAT U SAY UR GOIN TO DO?????

My Longing, My Hopeless Longing!!!!

Ok ok, so I might have laid it on a little to thick for Tasha as far as sucking it up and spilling her guts. I guess I should take my own advice. Remember the conversation about Elmo? I am having troubles. I am wanting and longing to get to know him. I want to love him, I want the chance to prove to him that I deserve more credit then I am being given. This is killing me. I want to cry. I don't know what to do, I do know that I hate it. I am so vulnerable when it comes to him. I would do anything. I try to show him that I care however, I don't think that he does. It hurts. I feel used, nasty, unwanted. I never thought for a minute that it would get to this. I have always, up to this point, negleted to say anything to him because I was afraid of losing such a wonderful person in my life. I know now that if I don't say something that it is going to hurt worse than if I were to keep quite. I need to swallow my pride and let happen whatever it is that needs to happen. Whatever happens, I just want him to know that I care for him so much and if he needed anything I would come running. I would never hurt you and I would always stick by your side. If a "relationship" doesn't happen then I want you to know that I am willing to settle for the friendship. I takes a lot of me to say and admit to this. My guard is let down and my pride is swallowed. I am willing to lose now. I am willing to confide in one person, care for that one person. I am tired of the game. I hate it. It means nothing to me. Even if nothing is created it will still mean nothing to me. No matter what it takes I am willing to make the sacrafice.

UPSET........

GRRRR......I AM TROUBLED AND I AM FEELING REALLY DOWN IN THE DUMPS. MAYBE ITS THE RAIN LATELY? I MISS MY MOM TERRIBLY. YESTERDAY I WAS WONDERING AROUND THE STORE TRYIN TO GET IDEAS FOR XMAS PRESENTS, HOPEFULLY TRYIN TO FIND SOMETHING TO BUY AND I COULDA JUST BAWLED MY EYES OUT RIGHT THERE. I SHOULD B HAPPY THAT SHES NOT SUFFERING ANYMORE AND I AM.....BUT I STILL MISS HER SO MUCH THAT I CAN HARDLY CATCH MY BREATH. I WALK AROUND WITH THIS GAPING HOLE IN MY HEART WONDERING IF IT WILL EVER START TO HEAL. I TRY TO DO WHAT I USUALLY DO IN MY LIFE CAUSE I KNOW MOM WOULDNT WANT IT ANY OTHER WAY BUT EVERYDAY THERE IS AT LEAST ONE THING THAT REMINDS ME OF HER. I KNOW I SHOULD B STRONG, IM NOT THE ONLY ONE THAT LOST HER. AND IM NOT SAYIN MY PAIN IS WORSE THAN MY BROTHERS---IM SURE HE FEELS IT TOO, ESPECIALLY NOW EVEN THOUGH NEITHER OF US R SAYING ANYTHING ABOUT IT. SO BUD, IF UR READING THIS.....I FEEL IT TOO AND IM SORRY AND IF U NEED ME U KNOW HOW TO GET ME. I HOPE EVERYONE CAN BARE WITH ME THRU THIS, IM A LIL OVER EMOTIONAL/SENSITIVE RIGHT NOW. I LOVE U GUYS SOOO MUCH AND IM SOOO GRATEFUL FOR ALL OF U BEING A PART OF MY LIFE. THANKS FOR BEING ALL THAT U R TO ME, I WOULD B LOST W/O U!!!

B'SING......

WELL HELLO OUT THERE! IM DONE WITH MY CLINICALS AND WILL TAKE MY FINAL EXAM ON THIS COMING TUESDAY--THANK GOD! I JUST HAVE TO DECIDE WHEN I WANT TO TAKE MY STATE TEST, DO I WANNA WAIT TIL JANUARY OR GET IT DONE IN DECEMBER???? HAVENT DECIDED FOR SURE JUST YET....... I HAVENT REALLY BEEN DOIN ANYTHING OUTSIDE OF CLASS. I HAVE HAD AN INTERESTING COVERSATION WITH CHICA ABOUT PPL BEING SCARED IN RELATIONSHIPS, U KNOW HAVING WALLS AND JUST NOT COMMUNICATING HOW THEY FEEL VERY WELL OR AT ALL. I MUST ADMIT THAT I HAVE SOME WALLS AND IM NOT GOOD AT JUST OPENLY TELLING SOMEONE THAT I CARE ABOUT THEM. I DO A BETTER JOB AT JUST SHOWING THEM I CARE BY WHAT I DO FOR THEM OR HOW I ACT AROUND THEM. U KNOW, THE "LITTLE THINGS"......FOR EXAMPLE----STAYING UP LATE JUST TO CALL THEM WHEN I HAVE TO GET UP VERY EARLY OR LEAVING LITTLE NOTES THEY CAN FIND TELLING THEM TO HAVE A GOOD DAY. SURE HEARING HOW SOMEONE FEELS ABOUT U IS A GREAT EGO BOOST AND IT MAKES U FEEL ALL WARM AND FUZZY, IT MAKES UR HEART SMILE, BUT THE WORDS DONT MEAN ANYTHING UNLESS THERE'S SOME KIND OF ACTION BEHIND IT........RIGHT? AT LEAST THATS THE WAY I LOOK AT IT. AS FOR MY WALLS........WELL, I DONT HAVE AN EXPLANATION BEYOND THIS----MY X WOULD TELL ME HOW HE FELT AND THEN ACT THE EXACT OPPOSITE. HE WOULD SAY THINGS TO ME TO GET MY HOPES UP OR TO SHUT ME UP AND THEN NEVER FOLLOW THRU. HE WOULD USE HOW I FELT TOWARDS HIM TO HIS OWN ADVANTAGE----LET ME POUR MY HEART OUT AND THEN DEVASTATE ME. HAVING TO DEAL WITH THAT SO MANY TIMES MAKES ME WORRIED THAT THE NEXT GUY WILL DO IT TOO. IT MAKES ME MORE THAN WORRIED----IT MAKES ME AFRAID TO LOVE SOMEONE THAT WAY AGAIN, MAKES ME AFRAID THAT THE NEXT ONE WILL JUST B SAYIN THAT SHIT TO B SAYIN IT CAUSE IN HINDSIGHT THATS EXACTLY THE WAY MY MARRIAGE WAS. I THINK HE SAID THAT HE LOVED ME AND CARED FOR ME JUST BECAUSE THATS WHAT UR "SUPPOSED" TO SAY WHEN UR MARRIED, NOT B/C HE FELT IT OR MEANT IT. SO YEAH I HAVE SOME WALLS WHEN IT COMES TO BELIEVING THAT A GUY REALLY FEELS FOR ME WHAT HE SAYS HE DOES. DO U BLAME ME FOR FEELING THAT WAY?!?! AND YEAH I KNOW THAT IN ORDER TO HAVE A RELATIONSHIP U HAVE TO TAKE THE RISK OF GETTING UR HEART RIPPED OUT B4 U CAN REALLY START FEELING THE "GOOD STUFF"..........ITS JUST REALLY HARD FOR ME TO TAKE THAT JUMP, ITS LIKE I WANNA KNOW WHAT IM GETTIN INTO FIRST---WHICH ISNT EVER GOIN TO HAPPEN, CAUSE LOVE AND RELATIONSHIPS DONT COME WITH THAT SORT OF GAURANTEE. AM I JUST FUCKED???? I DONT KNOW, BUT IM NOT BITTER---I KNOW THAT NOT ALL GUYS R LIKE MY X. I KNOW THAT IM READY FOR AN UPGRADE ;) AND I KNOW THAT IM READY TO LOVE SOMEONE EVEN MORE, EVEN HARDER THAN I LOVED HIM. ITS JUST THAT FIRST STEP............ITS STEPPING OFF THE EDGE OF COMFORT AND VERBALIZING HOW I FEEL AND THEN WAITING TO C IF THEY TRULY FEEL THE SAME OR R JUST BULLSHITTING ME. I, LIKE MOST PPL, HATE LETTING MYSELF BECOME VULNERABLE TO SOMEONE ELSE'S EMOTIONS AND ACTIONS........ITS NOT SO BAD IF ITS RECIPROCATED. AND ITS NOT SO BAD WHEN U PUT URSELF OUT THERE FOR PPL THAT U DONT REALLY CARE WHAT THEY THINK OR HOW THEY WILL REACT----THATS THE DIFFERENCE, CARING AND NOT CARING. JUST SO HAPPENS THAT I CARE THIS TIME............YEAH, I KNOW CHICA----QUIT BEING A PUSSY AND JUST SAY IT ALREADY!!! WHAT ASTOUNDING ADVICE THAT U GIVE ME!!! HAHAHA..............ANY OTHER ADVICE????

My new PUPPY! A seperate note!

Ok, no one likes drama. So, a good way to limit your drama intake is to find something that you like to do and or love. I have had a lot of stress here lately and I need something to help relieve that, something I could feel good about. Yes, I know, get laid but sometimes its deeper than that and a booty call just don't make it better. I went out and got my first puppy. Her name is ANGEL! She is a Sherpard Mix, 4 months old, and very playful. However, she did give me a scare. The other day she started not eating and not drinking. I had to take her to the Vet because I was very worried and how this could effect her health. She is sence doing better and gotten back to her tipical puppy self. God love her. What a blessing! Its away for me to get away from everything else. I needed another positive in my life. Now, on a seperate note, I have desided to take a break from the dating game and get things straight and figure out what the hell I want. Like I said before, I am not perfect and I know that there is always room for self improvment. So, the applications have now been put on hold and I will let everyone know when there is an open position. I am sure everyone can respect that. I need to enjoy life and I am 21 and now is the best time to enjoy it. So bring on the bars, drinks, and close friends (the rat pack) and family. It time to enjoy life and live love and the rest will come in time. Luv ya!

F.Y.I.

Hey, look people, no one likes an "ATTENTION WHORE" so get over yourself!

Asian Chicks, WTF!!!!!

What is it with guys and asian chicks? I think its their soft brown nipples! LMAO!!!!

WELL SHIT!

YEAH THATS RIGHT, SHIT! FIRST OF ALL I CANT WAIT FOR SCHOOL TO B OVER, GRRRR. SECOND, CHICA'S X U CAN SHUT UR MOUTH OR SUCK MY BALLS! THE WHOLE FUCKIN POINT OF THIS SITE IS TO SHARE OUR LIVES WITH EVERYONE OUT THERE. AND THATS ALL IM GOIN TO SAY BOUT U, THE SHIT U SAY AND THE STUPID FUCKIN SITUATION U AND CHICA HAD CAUSE ITS NOT WORTH ME WASTING MY BREATH! THIRDLY, IM SURE EVERYONE READ THE FUCKIN COMMENT MY X DECIDED TO LEAVE ME ON MY LAST POST.........WASNT THAT A FUCKIN HOOT?!?!?! ACTUALLY IT WAS BULLSHIT. I AM NOT INTERESTED IN HOOKIN BACK UP WITH SOMEONE WHO CAN SO EASILY DISREGUARD ME, MY FEELINGS, MY DREAMS AND ANYTHING THATS IMPORTANT TO ME!!! AS A MATTER OF FACT IF I WAS EVER INTERESTED IN TRYIN TO GET BACK WITH AN X I WOULDNT B SOOOO OPEN ABOUT MY SEXUAL EXPLOITS, AND FLAUNT THE FACT THAT IM STILL OUT THERE FUCKIN WHATEVER MOVES!!! TYPICALLY, BREAK UPS HAPPEN FOR A REASON AND IF U REALIZE THAT U MISS WHAT U LOST AND WANT IT BACK THEN U NEED TO DO TWICE AS MUCH WORK TO SHOW UR WORTHINESS THAN IF U HAD JUST MET SOMEONE RANDOMLY AND WAS TRYIN TO HOOK UP.........GET WHAT IM SAYIN?!?! DOESNT REALLY MATTER, CAUSE MY X TAUGHT ME ALL THE TRICKS TO THESE SORTS OF MIND GAMES AND IM A FUCKIN PRO NOW AT CATCHIN 'EM QUICK! ON TOP OF IT, AND THIS IS WHATS REALLY IMPORTANT..........I ONLY GIVE MY ATTENTION TO A PERSON THAT IS WORTHY!!!! THINK ABOUT THAT..................

TO: CHICA'S X........

FIRST OF ALL, U HAVE NO RIGHT WHATSOEVER TO SAY CHICA IS PUTTIN U DOWN TO LOOK GOOD FOR HER FRIENDS! WE ALL KNEW FROM THE GET GO U WERENT GOOD ENOUGH FOR HER SO IT DOESNT MATTER WHAT SHE SAYS OR DOESNT SAY. SECOND, SHE'S TELING THE TRUTH AND THE TRUTH HURTS. NOT LIKE SHE'S SAYIN U WERE AN ASSHOLE ALTHOUGH WE'VE ALL COME TO THAT CONCLUSION ANYWAYS.....U KNOW THAT THE SITUATION BETWEEN HER AND U WAS EXACTLY LIKE SHE CALLED IT SO DONT EVEN PLAY THAT SHIT! QUIT LIVIN IN UR SICK LITTLE DILUSION AND GET REAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DEAL WITH URSELF AND STOP TRYIN TO MAKE UR ISSUES AN EXCUSE FOR THE WAY U LIVE UR LIFE AND TREAT PPL!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ONE LAST THOUGHT........

SO I WAS VISITING CHICA AND WE GOT ON THE SUBJECT OF SEX, GO FIGURE?!?!?! ANYHOO.........WE WERE WONDERING WHATS UP WITH GUYS AND THEIR DICKS, MORE SPECIFICALLY THEIR DICK SIZE. WE WANNA KNOW WHAT MAKES A GUY "BLESSED" VERSUS OTHERS? CAUSE SERIOUSLY, WE HAVE BOTH SEEN GUYS THAT HAVE BIG HANDS/FEET OR R TALL BUT ITS LIKE WHAT HAPPENED DOWN BELOW? LMAO AND THEN WE HAVE SEEN GUYS THAT R SHORTER OR HAVE SMALL HANDS/FEET AND R LIKE HOLY SHIT, LOOK AT THAT THING!! ;) SO WHATS THE DEAL?!?!?!?!? IS IT JUST GENETICS OR LIFE STYLE OR EATING HABITS OR HOW OFTEN U GUYS R WHACKIN OFF?!?!?!?!?! ITS LIKE THE DIFFERENCES RANGE FROM SUMMER SAUSAGE TO MINIATURE FRANKS!!!!!! WHAT GIVES? HOW CAN THERE B SUCH A VARIETY? WE DO WANNA KNOW SO IF U HAVE ANY IDEAS OR EXPLANATIONS HIT US UP.......... :) HAHAHA

THANKSGIVING........

SO HERES MY IDEA, THE RAT PACK IS GOIN TO DO T-DAY OUR STYLE. WE'LL ALL GET TOGETHER THE NITE B4 THE REAL T-DAY AND HAVE OURSELVES A NICE DINNER, HANG OUT, AND DO WHAT WE USUALLY DO (MINUS THE ALCOHOL, HAHAHA) !!! EVERYONES CHIPPIN IN, BRINGIN A SIDEDISH AND ILL FIX THE BIG OL TURKEY--MMMMHAHAHAHAH, ROAST FUCKER ROAST!!! ........IF ONLY I COULD PLASTER SOMEONES PICTURE TO THAT BIRD........HAHAHA.........ANYWAYS, THATS THE PLAN FOR RIGHT NOW AND SO FAR EVERYONE IS DOWN WITH IT, CEPT ONE INDIVIDUAL THAT I INVITED-----SOMETHIN ABOUT BEING UNCOMFORTABLE AND ANXIOUS???? I CAN SYMPATHIZE, REALLY I CAN........BUT I FEEL THAT IF THIS PERSON REALLY CARES AND WANTS TO B INVOLVED IN MY LIFE THAT THEY JUST NEED TO MAKE A SACRIFICE, SUCK IT UP AND JOIN IN ON THE FUN. SERIOUSLY I KNOW WE SOUND SCARY BUT WE RNT AND PPL SHOULD SPEND THE HOLIDAYS (AND ANY OTHER DAY FOR THAT MATTER) WITH THE PPL IN THEIR LIFE THAT THEY CARE ABOUT!!! THATS ALL THERE IS TO IT.....AM I BEING OVERLY RIDICULOUS OR MY EXPECTATIONS TOO HIGH??????????????

HOOCHIE MAMA

GIRL.....I DONT KNOW HOW MANY MORE TIMES U COULD SAY "KNOW" IN THAT LAST POST, BUT U CRACK ME UP!!! IM SORRY SHITHEAD IS GETTIN TO YA, BUT FUCK HIM AND HIS PUSSY WAYS-----HES NOT A REAL MAN AND WE ALL KNOW IT, SO TELL HIM TO PISS OFF AND KEEP UR EYES OPEN FOR A REAL STUD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (IF HE'S ANY KIND OF A "MAN" HE'LL GET IT AND WONT B PISSED AT U FOR DOIN WHAT U GOTTA DO TO HELP URSELF) BESIDES, U DONT NEED ANYONE ELSE'S LOVE CEPT THE RAT PACK'S :) CANT WAIT TO C U.......I MISS YA !!!

SCHOOL.........

WELL I JUST FINISHED MY FIRST WEEK OF SCHOOL, ONE MORE TO GO! WOO HOO! LETS HOPE I DONT KILL ALL THE FUCKIN RETARDS THAT IM IN CLASS WITH ;) THEY ALL RANGE FROM THE LIL GIRL WHO CONSTANTLY ASKS, "DO WE HAVE TO DO THAT IN CLINICALS?" TO THE CINCI BITCH WHO CONSTANTLY GOES OFF ON PERSONAL RAMPAGES AND ASKS IRRELEVANT Q'S TO WASTE TIME---THEN TO BITCH ABOUT HOW WE DONT GET TO PRACTICE OUR SKILLS VERY MUCH!!! IS IT JUST ME OR DOES SHE NOT MAKE ANY SENSE?!?!?! THEN WE HAVE THE LPN BITCH WHO DOESNT WANT TO CHANGE DIRTY DEPENDS AND CLEAN UP AFTER RESIDENTS---GOOD THING SHES GOIN ON TO B A NURSE, ALTHOUGH IM NOT SURE UD WANT HER TO TAKE CARE OF U. AND THEN WE HAVE WEED GIRL WHO WILL ASK THE TEACHER TO REPEAT WHAT SHE JUST SAID----HMMM LESS WEED, MORE FOCUS!!! GRRRRRRRR SO WHILE IM GETTING A GOOD "TECHNICAL" REFRESHER COURSE I DO FEEL THE NEED TO STAND UP IN FRONT OF CLASS AND MAKE THE ANNOUNCEMENT: UR JOB IS TO WIPE ASS AND CARE FOR THESE RESIDENTS AS U WOULD CARE FOR URSELF! U WILL DO EVERYTHING WE PRACTICE HERE IN CLINICALS CAUSE THATS UR FUCKIN JOB!!! MAYBE THAT WOULD PAINT A CLEARER PICTURE FOR THESE DUMBASSES!!!! BUT ANYWAYS IM DOIN REAL GOOD ON ALL THE TESTS AND PRACTICES AND ETC. KEEP UR FINGERS CROSSED FOR ME THAT I DONT HIT SOMEONE NEXT WEEK IN CLASS----ILL KEEP Y'ALL UPDATED ;)

YAY!

Hola from the hoochie mama! Hey y'all I wanted to type a drunken entry! Okay so tipsy whatever. I want to rant and rave, but I know that all my rat pack really know. What Ireally want is just to hang with my rat pack for some reason. I don't know anymore. I wonder if I will ever really know.

ENGLISH, JOY!!!!!

I got to talk to my british friend last night! I was so excited! We were on the phone for over an hour. Talk about school girl. That was me of course he didn't know that. I was so happy to finally get to talk to him. Everyone knows how I feel about british accents! Awwwww! Anyway, I am really interested on learning more about him and the UK. I am planning a trip to the UK in the summer. I can't wait to go. He is a great person. Very kind, open minded, a gentalman, sweet, etc. It was just awesome! I don't know much else to say. Awesome, great conversation!

uSpilling a lot of SHIT(3 of 3)

This really isn't a bad thing. Just something I would like to share. I went out on a date today, with Version 2's friend which I will call him Mr. Love! HAHAHAHA thats just for you hun, Love you too! LMAO!!!! Anyway, I enjoyed Mr. Love's company very much. He was a gentalman. A very horny one at that. I didn't fuck him on the first date. I ain't easy. Anyway, I am not sure what to do or think. He has things to deal with on the home front and I am not sure I want to let someone have me not knowing whether or not I can have him for keeps. I don't like sharing. I think we hit it off pretty well. I was impressed. I would really like to meet with him again. Everything is fare game after the first date;)- I am not sure what else to say. So everyone have a great day! P.S To Mr. Love I am really glad that I met you but I am a little uncomfortable with your situation with the EX. I think we need to talk.

Spilling a lot of shit!(2 of 3)

Hey everyone! Look, there is this guy that I have been fucking for over a year. I told him from the get go that I was worth more than a piece of ass. He exclaimed that he understood and I proceeded to let him chase me around for a while longer. We will call him ELMO. I finally let him get the best of me, literally. He had told me at that time that he wasn't wanting a relationship. I was hurt but continued to see him. I figured he would evenually come around once he found out more about me. The sex wasn't nessarcarly great but it wasn't bad either. The more and more I was with him however, it became wonderful. I knew then even though the sex hasn't changed, my feelings had. I know I am falling for him. So I tried to do little things to let him know that I cared and that he met something to me; back rubs, wear certain outfits, and talk about things other than sex. He don't seem to want to care or he just ain't getting my hints. I really enjoy Elmo's company and I would like to spend more time with him than I do. I don't know what to do. Should I tell him flat out or should I not do anything at all. What do I do? I don't want to lose what I have but if it could be something more than I would like it too. I am so confused about our quote unquote relationship. I would do anything for him even though I am not liking the fact that I have fallin' for him. I think about him often and wonder how he is doing and what he is thinking about. Is it me and anytime or am I really just what he had intended from the get go, A BOOTY CALL!!!! Its killing me inside and I am torn on what to do. If anyone has some advice please give it. What would you do if you were in this situation? I will glady write you and read your comments with an open mind. Thanx too all!

Spilling a lot of SHIT!!!!(1 of 3)

Hey ya'll! I thought I would tell you all know some fucked up things in my life. But first Hi too my Rat Pack ya'll know what I am talking about! Anyway, I dated this guy for a short period of time and I now know what guys mean about girls bitching all the time because I can relate even though it wasn't a girl I was with. I went through a lot of emotional shit with this guy. First off isn't over his exgirl which dumped him over a year ago. Now, I try to be a good girlfriend and I know I am not perfect by no means but damn! I had to put up with this shit through out the whole relationship. He pissed and moaned over this chick as if she was something great and made me feel second best. He cried over what he didn't have and didn't do shit about it until after I left him and then all of the sudden he is doing better and he wants me back and he is sorry. Meanwhile at the end of our relationship I am meant to look like the asshole. I tried to help him out as much as I could but no help in return. Everytime he came to see me he had to always borrow money, which he hasn't paid back, for him to go home or whatever. I had to pay for everything. It sucked. Now I know what a lot of guys go through and I feel for ya, including the girls who was ever in my situation. My friends and family tried to warn me but I didn't want to listen. I am very sorry ya'll! Now that we are 0ver he still calls and stupidly, at times, I call him back trying to be nice. Oh brother! He tries to make me jealous by saying he has met this chick and blablabla. Who fucking cares. I wish her the best of luck with him because she is going to need it. I am not saying that he isn't a good person just not one that anyone should date until he has his shit straight and that will probably be whenever he stops and realizes life and the world don't evolve around him. Its sad to say that I am doing better than him and my age than he is at his. OUCH!!!!! Anyway, I guess that is life, a BITCH! And I don't remember being a lesbian.

THIS WEEKEND.....

I HAD A GOOD WEEKEND---SAW VERSION 2, THAT WENT EXTREMELY WELL ;) I ALSO GOT TO SEE MANDY. I THINK SHE HAS A HOOK UP WITH ONE OF VERSION 2'S FRIENDS TOMORROW MORNIN! GO GET 'IM GIRL!!! GOT TO SEE MY BRO FOR A LIL BIT TOO, ALWAYS INTERESTING. TODAY HE TALKED ABOUT THE END OF THE WORLD AND KICKIN EVERYONES ASS........AND ABOUT BEING IN CONTROL. I WONDER BOUT HIM SOMETIMES, BUT THEN AGAIN GOD KNOWS SOME OF THE SHIT THAT HAS COME OUTTA MY MOUTH MMMMHAHAHA!!! DO Y'ALL REALIZE NEXT MONTH IS CHRISTMAS??????? IM NOT LOOKIN FORWARD TO IT, I FEEL SICK JUST THINKIN ABOUT IT. (THOSE THAT KNOW ME KNOW Y) I DONT HAVE ANYTHING FOR ANYONE AND IM DREADING GOIN INTO THOSE STORES!!! UGH. OH, AND HOOCHIE MAMA, DONT FEEL LEFT OUT BY ME AND CHICA'S ADVENTURE...........U KNOW WE'RE GOIN TO TAKE U!! AND WE BOTH KNOW CHICA IS STILL THE EXPERT ON THAT SORT OF THING! ;) ...............ANYHOO I THINK I HAVE SOMETHIN IN THE WORKS FOR THANKSGIVING, RAT PACK STYLE SO ILL KEEP Y'ALL POSTED!!!!! :)

WOW!!!

SO I HAD ANOTHER FIRST WITH MANDY......... :) WE WENT TO THE LION'S DEN!!!! HAHAHA I DIDNT KNOW THEY MADE DILDOS THAT BIG AROUND!!!! MY GOD!!!! AND ITS FUNNY THAT SOOO MANY PPL GO THERE AT SUCH AN ODD TIME OF NITE, GUESS WE ALL FEEL A LITTLE UNCOMFORTABLE ABOUT VISITING A STORE LIKE THAT. BUT I WASNT AS "EMBARASSED" AS I THOUGHT I WAS GOIN TO B---U KNOW LIKE A SCHOOL GIRL OR SOMETHIN!!! ;) I THINK I MAY HAVE TO REVISIT SOON!!! ITS LIKE HAVING A WISH LIST, ;) .............WELL AT LEAST I GOT THAT CHECKED OFF MY LIST OF THINGS TO DO B4 I DIE!!!! THANKS CHICA FOR BEIN THERE, U WERE A WORLD OF HELP, HAHAHA :)

HELLO!!!!! 

New Piercing!!!!!!!!!!!

Whats up everyone! I have got a new piercing. This now makes 12! I am excited. Everyone knew it was coming. Its my thing ya know. I love'em. Just in case you were wondering I pierced the nose! Anyway just thought you should know! Talk to ya'll later.

WHATEVER....

THIS WK HAS BEEN DIFF.....I HAVENT SEEN TIM AT ALL, SAW MANDY TODAY AND OFCOURSE I TALK TO DARCY ONLINE JUST BOUT EVERYDAY. I GOT GOOD NEWS THAT THERE WAS A SPOT OPEN FOR MY STNA CLASSES---I HAVE TO GET RECERTIFIED, SO I TOOK IT. I START ON MONDAY, WOOHOO! LATELY I HAVE BEEN HAVIN ALOT OF CONVOS ABOUT JEALOUSY.......I DONT GET IT, MAYBE ITS SOMETHIN IN THE AIR, MAYBE I SHOULD B PAYIN MORE ATTENTION---AS IF IM SUPPOSED TO B GETTIN SOME LIFE LESSON......I THINK JEALOUSY STEMS FROM CARING BUT TOO MUCH TEARS A RELATIONSHIP APART, CAUSE U HAVE TO B ABLE TO TRUST THE PERSON UR WITH.....SO MAYBE IT ISNT ABOUT CARING AT ALL, MAYBE ITS ABOUT TRUST, BUT U TRUST SOMEONE BASED ON WHETHER OR NOT THEY KEEP THEIR WORD(CAUSE THATS ALL A PERSON IS WORTH, THEIR WORD), AND U BUILD TRUST FROM HONESTY AND GOOD COMMUNICATION---BUT A PERSON THAT IS HONEST AND COMMUNICATES WELL IS HARD TO FIND THESE DAYS. AND HOW DO U KNOW THAT THE PERSON UR TALKIN TO IS TELLIN THE TRUTH OR SPITTIN GAME TO GET SOMETHING THEY WANT, TOO MANY PPL R MOTIVATED BY ALTERIOR MOTIVES.....DOES THE CYCLE EVER END??? I GUESS IT BOILS DOWN TO FAITH, U HAVE TO HAVE FAITH IN WHAT THEY R TELLIN YA AND IF THEY R SINCERE IT WILL SHOW BY THEM KEEPING THEIR WORD AND THEN TRUST WILL BUILD AND THEN THERE SHOULDNT B ANY JEALOUSY.........RIGHT???????????? LEMME KNOW

Fuck U Dude!!!! 

WTF?!?! 

Fat lesbian ballerina 

Ho for sale!  

Dark Angel and Pimp 

NOT HALLOWEEN..... just kidding!

I will try not to copy too much from everyone else. I had a great weekend with the rat pack. It was just what I needed. Movie, friends, alcohol, and BEING A HO! Tasha's ho nonetheless. It was great with the exception of the philosophic bullshit I was telling. Tasha yellow cause you are usually happy except on your asshole days. Tim clear because I don't know you well so you seem to magnify people around you. And Mandy pink because she is beautiful on the inside and it is a true beauty. Thank you hun for showing me what I needed to see. *hugs all of the rat pack* I can't wait to see you all again at thankgiving and until then I miss y'all so much!

HALLOWEEN!!!

Hi ya'll!!!! OMG! Let me tell you a story about a slammin Halloween party! The parting basically started on Friday. It was the girls night, well, aside from celebrating Tim's birthday. I got to Tasha's house first. It was great to be back in the neighborhood again, well, with Tasha anyways! She had made some jello shots eariler that day and of course you know that I had to try to make sure that the finished product was good. Let me tell you, mmmmmmmmmmm. Anyway, we then went to the store to grap more jello and more Schnapps. I became a very beautiful evening. We finished making the shots and soon there after Darcy had came over. OMG its HOOCHIEMAMMA!!!!!!! I miss her so much. All my girls are so much fun. Anyway, again all of us girls were taking shots. After awhile we went and seen the new movie "SAW". Awesome movie I do reckmend. We got back to the house and Tim was waiting for us. We had cake and ice cream and SHOTS of course. Later on that night we and some friends stop by to see us. Chris and his friend. They didn't drink but we still had a lot of fun. We talked about crazy off the wall shit. We came up with a new sport but I am not going to talk about it now. We all stayed up for hours. We didn't get to bed until about 5:30am. CCCRRRAAAZZZYYY!!!!! Whats crazier is that us girls turned around and got up at like Noon. We had to get the finishing touches to our costumes. We got home and started to get ready for the party. Three girls, in a one bedroom appartment, is NUTS! We were all showering and having makeup done, which I would now like to take a moment to thank Tasha for my hotel room and my makeup "THANK U FOR MAKING THINGS HAPPEN THIS WEEKEND!!!", anyway, it was actually more organized then u would think. Tim was running late as usual, love ya Tim, he finally showed up and he still needed to go and get his costume. While he was gone all of us girls and finally gotten ready. We had neighbors take pictures and we took pictures. Tasha and Darcy made an awesome PIMP and HO! Hot mammas!!!! I, however, was a dark angel. I didn't follow the pimp and ho theme but we all still looked HOT! Tim finally got back and he was a whale of a woman in a totoo. That was the funnest shit I have ever seen. We all went to the Haunted House soon there after. It was kick ass. I am not a big haunted house fan but it was pretty good. We got back to Miss Muffy Muffins house and started to drink. We drank, played cards, listened to music, have an awesome time, and got anylized by Darcy. Long story but let me give you a preview, all of us has a color and dominates our lives, Which is yours? After a long night of partying we all got to go to bed, at about 5:30am, again. Darcy and I was up at about 9:30am and then got Miss Muffy Muffins up. Darcy had too leave shortly there after. It was very sad. Love ya girl. At about 1pm I left Tasha's. I wanted to cry. I am so used to being with my friends everyday or so and being able to see Tasha whenever I wanted. I miss them all so much and I can't wait too see all of my BEST FRIENDS again. I Love You!!!

HALLOWEEN....

WOW! THIS WEEKEND WAS KICKASS! :) FRIDAY US GIRLS WENT TO SEE "SAW"--GOOD MOVIE, Y'ALL SHOULD SEE IT....I ALSO BAKED TIM A CAKE FOR HIS BDAY AND MANDY AND I MADE JELLO SHOTS...WOOHOO! WE PLAYED CARDS AND LAUGHED LONG N HARD....AT SOME POINT IN THE EVENING THE GROUP DISCUSSED AN ASTRO-GLIDE SLIDE AND TURNING IT INTO AN OLYMPIC SPORT??? I DONT KNOW MUCH BOUT THAT CONVO CAUSE I WAS DRAWING ALL OVER DARCY'S ARMS---I PUT SPIDER WEBS UP N DOWN HER ARM! HAHA, WHICH RUBBED OFF ON MY LEATHER COUCH--GRRRR SO ONE OF THE OTHER RAT PACK MEMBERS WILL HAVE TO EXPLAIN THAT SHIT!! SATURDAY WAS THE BIG PARTY.......MANDY WAS ABLE TO HANG WITH US AFTERALL, SHE DRESSED UP AS A DARK ANGEL AND WELL U KNOW THAT I WAS A PIMP AND DARCY WAS MY HO AND TIM......WELL.....HE WAS A FAT LESBIAN BALLARINA, WHICH DID NOTHIN FOR MY PIMPIN BUISNESS!!! WE ALL WENT KROGERING TO GET SOME DRINKS AND YEAH WE GOT ALOT OF ATTENTION....JUST WAIT TIL U C THE PICS I PUT UP!! HAHA THEN WE WENT TO THE HAUNTED HOUSE, WHICH WASNT WORTH THE 12 BUCKS WE PAID TO GET IN---OH WELL. WE HAD TO WALK THRU A MAZE IN PITCH BLACK, TIM GOT US STUCK IN A DEAD END---WAY TO GO DUMBASS!! AND MOST OF THE MONSTERS WERE MAKIN REMARKS BOUT HOW WE WERE DRESSED UP. DARCY KEPT SCREAMIN WHICH MADE ME SCREAM----AND YES THERE WERE BIG SCARY CLOWNS BUT THIS YR I REFRAINED MYSELF AND DIDNT HIT ANY OF THEM THAT FOLLOWED ME! GO ME!! THE HOUSE DID HAVE THIS COOL THING WITH A RUMBLING FLOOR AND A DRAW BRIDGE, CEPT THAT U WERENT EXPECTING THE DROP OFF AND COULD EASILY FALL ON UR ASS. TIM HAD SOME GUY TOUCH HIS LEG WITH A CHAINSAW, BUT WE ALL MADE IT OUT ALIVE!! HAHA SO THEN WE WENT OUT TO EAT, THAT WAS INTERESTING....I KEPT ASKIN EVERYONE IF THEY NEEDED SOME ASS CAUSE I HAD A HO FOR SALE----BUT IM PRETTY SURE MY HO SHOULDA BEEN DOIN THE ADVERTISING.....FINALLY WE MADE IT BACK TO MY HOUSE FOR THE REAL FUN.......MMMMMMMHAHAHAHAHA ;) OH, AND B4 ALL THIS GOT STARTED US GIRLS WENT TO THE MALL, UR NOT GONNA BELIEVE WHAT MANDY PAID FOR HER WINGS!! U DONT NEED ME TO TELL YA HOW CHICS R IN THE MALL.....BUT WE DID STOP AT MCDONALDS AND FUCKIN WAITED FOR 20 MIN. FOR OUR FOOD, I THOUGHT IT WAS A "FAST" FOOD JOINT!?!? IM NOT GOIN TO SAY ANYMORE CAUSE I KNOW THE GIRLS WANT TO TELL YA STUFF TOO.......SO HOPE Y'ALL HAD A HAPPY HALLOWEEN, CAUSE I SURE DID! HAHA :)

THIS WEEK......

THIS WEEK HAS BEEN HECTIC, IVE HAD SOMETHIN TO DO EVERYDAY SO FAR......MONDAY WAS PRETTY RELAXED, BUT TUESDAY I HAD AN INTERVIEW AT THE SAME FACILITY THAT MANDY WORKS---HAVE NO IDEA IF I GOT IT OR NOT, "THEY'LL CALL ME" NEXT WEEK, WEDNESDAY I HAD DINNER WITH VERSION2---GOOD TIME, THURSDAY I WENT TO THE CHIROPRACTOR AND I THINK HE HAS BROKEN MY LOWER BACK--IT FEELS WORSE THAN IT DID WHEN I WALKED INTO THAT PLACE!!! ALSO I SAW MY GIRL ANGIE....SHES OK CONSIDERING SHE HAD SURGERY YESTERDAY---IT WAS NICE TO SEE HER, SHES BEEN SUPER BUSY WITH HER UPCOMING WEDDING, AND FRIDAY IS TIMS BIRTHDAY, WOO HOO!! EVERYONE SAY HAPPY B-DAY....OK THATS ENOUGH, SO LATER DARCY, MANDY, TIM AND I WILL B HANGIN OUT---I THINK WE'RE GOIN TO SEE THAT MOVIE "SAW" AND PROBABLY HAVE SOME CAKE.........WHO KNOWS AND SATURDAY IS THE BIG HALLOWEEN PARTY---KNOW UR ROLE BITCHES!!!! HAHAHA

Moving!

Hey ya'll. As u all know I am moving to work with my nanny job. Today is the big day. I am moving out of my appartment and moving in. I hate it that I am farther away from my gang but I will still see them and talked to them on the phone and online. It won't take long to move all of my things. Its just like moving out of a dorm room. A couple of trucks will do the trick. I hope it won't take long but oh well if it does. I got all night.
I am sure everyone is wondering how the date went last night. It went very well. Very impressed. He was very much so a gentleman. I hope to see him again very soon.
Oh, FYI: I was asked question last night about who I thought was the most attractive guy ever. I take the question and did some serious thinking. Took every aspect into consideration. Ya know personality and physical aspects. Well, lets just say think back to "Real World London" MTV. I love guys with accents and that are responsible. Oh yeah!!!! Thats a pleasant thought=-)

Random Shit

Hey y'all, Sorry I haven't been posting much. College life is hectic yo. 18 credit hours and wroking 12 hours a week. Anyways just wantes to drop a quick line. I am so excited about halloween and sorry mandy won't be there. I hope to see her on friday though so that all the rat pack will be together. I feel bad that I can't visit the rest of the rat pack more.
So I wanna start putting up random bullshit for people to think about. First since I keep thinking about this... is society made to try to help everyone by helping them grow as separate entities or is society made to help people by protecting them from people who are not always good or some other reason all together? If you have any ideas please give me a comment. Thanks.

Hey Ya'll

Hey its mandy! Whats up everyone. I just got my computer so this is the first post but don't worry there will be more to come. I have very excited to have a web site with all of my friends. There is a lot of love between us all so to all of those negitive people out the "FUCK OFF"! There is nothing that will break the bond. I do understand that everyone is entitled to there oppion but there is no need for rudeness. I can't wait for everyone to get to know the "Rat Pack". We are an exciting, full of fun group that keeps everyone with smiles, well, except those with a negitive attitude. We will gladly put them in there place. Any who, as it was posted I will not be attending the halloween party this Saturday. I wish I could be there but got to pay the bills, that and no one would cover for me at work. I will keep that in mind. I work a lot of hours anymore, 2 jobs. I am a nanny during the week and work with mentally handicapp on the weekends. Lifes hectic but I still have my fun. Hope to talk to everyone soon. Take care!

ABOUT THE WEEKEND.......

LETS SEE.....I SAW MANDY AND TIM OFCOURSE, FOUND OUT THAT TIM WILL B HERE FOR THE HALLOWEEN PLANS, BUT MANDY WONT :( THAT SUCKS!! I SAW MY BROTHER. HIM AND HIS GF AND I HAD A DISCUSSION ABOUT HOW WE'RE ALL ANIMALS......HE WAS TRYIN TO GET HIS GF TO EAT THEIR PET FROG, SINCE ANIMALS EAT OTHER ANIMALS. HAHAHA STRANGE BUT IT WAS GOOD FOR A LAUGH. MANDY FINALLY GOT A COMPUTER ON FRIDAY.......I WENT WITH HER TO THIS CREEPY GUYS HOUSE OUT IN THE BOONIES TO GET IT. WE COULDNT REMEMBER HIS ADDRESS SO I WAS YELLIN OUT THE WINDOW, " HEY DO U SELL COMPUTERS?". THAT WASNT VERY EFFECTIVE, BUT WE FOUND IT ANYWAYS. :) SHE ALSO ENDED UP GETTIN A DATE FOR TONITE, WOO HOO! U GO GIRL!!!! (NOT WITH THE CREEPY PC GUY) I TALKED TO THE GUY THAT I KEEP HAVIN "DATES" WITH.......FROM NOW ON IM GOIN TO CALL HIM VERSION2 ......THAT WAS INTERESTING, HE TOLD ME THAT HE LIKED BEING IN CONTROL OF THINGS, YEAH WHO DOESNT? BUT I LET HIM KNOW THAT HE CANT HAVE CONTROL FOREVER----SOONER OR LATER U HAVE TO GIVE IN AND LET EMOTIONS BECOME INVOLVED OTHERWISE RELATIONSHIPS, PLATONIC OR OTHERWISE CANT DEVELOP, THAT AND I KNOW I COULD ROCK HIS WORLD!!!! HAHAHA THEN I WAS SUPPOSED TO MEET THIS OTHER GUY........I ENDED UP WITH MY PULSE RACING AND COULDNT CATCH MY BREATH SO THAT DIDNT HAPPEN. SO IF UR READING THIS, IM REALLY SORRY---AGAIN!!! HES TOTALLY COOL WITH IT, WHICH IS KICK ASS TO ME, I JUST HOPE THAT MAYBE WE GET TO TRY TO MEET AGAIN. NOW FOR MEMEBERS OF THE RAT PACK: IF U FUCKERS DONT START POSTING IM GONNA KICK UR ASSES!!!! GRRRRRR OH! MY CRAZY NEIGHBOR GUY CAME OVER FOR A LIL BIT TOO.......THEN PROCEEDS TO TELL ME THAT HIS GF GETS ALL FREAKED OUT WHEN HE COMES OVER HERE-----LIKE I FUCKIN WANT HER MAN, UGH!!!! THE THING IS, IS THAT I TELL HER TO COME OVER ALL THE TIME AND SHE JUST DOESNT. SO FUCK THAT----I WOULDNT WANT HIM IF SOMEONE PAID ME. HAHAHA THATS IT Y'ALL, MORE LATER.........................................

pic of Darcy 

pic of Mandy 

??????????????

SO IM NOT SO SURE MY HALLOWEEN PLANS R GOIN TO COME THRU OR NOT. TIMS JOB HAS HIM OUTTA STATE THAT WEEK AND THE GUY COVERING FOR MANDY SEEMS TO WANT TO RENIG ON HIS WORD........GRRRRR I HATE WHEN PLANS DONT COME THRU!!! AT LEAST HOOCHIE MAMA STILL WANTS TO B MY HO!! HAHAHA ON ANOTHER NOTE, I HAD A DATE LAST NITE. TOO BAD I WAS TOO SICK TO DO ANYTHING OTHER THAN GO TO DINNER, WHICH MADE A REAPPEARENCE LATER ANYWAYS.....HOW EMBARASSING, IM SURE I MADE QUITE AN IMPRESSION ON HIM!! NEEDLESS TO SAY, HE STEPPED UP AND TOOK CARE OF ME, WHICH GAVE ME QUITE AN IMPRESSION!! SO I LAYED ON THE COUCH AND WE WATCHED A MOVIE, THE REST OF THE TIME WE JUST TALKED AND TALKED AND TALKED........I HAVENT HAD CONVERSATION LIKE THAT IN 4YRS!! (NO OFFENSE TO MY LOVED ONES, U KNOW WHO U R) I HAVE TO GIVE CREDIT WHERE CREDIT IS DUE........HE WAS A GENTLEMAN, SEE "NYMPHO" THERE R STILL GOOD ONES OUT THERE...IM TRYIN TO HOOK U UP!! :) THATS ABOUT IT, IM STILL SICK WITH THIS DAMN COLD, WHICH FUCKIN SUCKS, GRRRR. MORE LATER............MAYBE ILL HEAR SOME JUICY GOSSIP ABOUT MYSELF THAT I CAN SHARE WITH EVERYONE................HAHAHAHAHHA (GOD I HOPE NOT)

I guess now it is time to hear from Hoochie Mama. I still don't know how I got that name, but I am so used to it now that it would be weird if the rat pack didn't call me that.
So for Halloween I am going to be Tasha's ho and I am all excited. I don't really know whay but I am. It will be fun. Yeah I don't know what to talk about yet. So I will talk to y'all later about more fun things. Adios.

pic of Tasha 

pic of Mandy(left) and Tasha(right) 

pic of Tim 

LAST NITE....

HEY Y'ALL. SO YESTERDAY WAS SWEETEST DAY.....DID U GET SOMEONE SOMETHING OR VICE VERSA? I KNOW U FELLAS OUT THERE SEEM TO THINK ITS JUST ANOTHER HALLMARK HOLIDAY, BUT ITS NOT ABOUT BUYING SHIT. U CAN B SWEET AND COOK DINNER OR SIMPLY TELL THAT SPECIAL SOMEONE THAT UR GRATEFUL FOR THEM BEING A PART OF UR LIFE........THINK ABOUT THAT ONE NEXT TIME, CAUSE TOO OFTEN WE DONT TELL THE PPL IN OUR LIVES THAT WE CARE....NEEDLESS TO SAY CONSIDERING THAT WE R ALL SINGLE WE DIDNT EVEN HAVE A FIGHTING CHANCE!! :-P HOWEVER I DID GET TO SPEND SOME TIME WITH SOMEONE THAT I FIND INTRIGUING........WE'LL SEE WHERE THAT LEADS, CAUSE HERE LATELY I HAVENT BEEN HAVIN MUCH LUCK WITH THE MALE POPULATION OUT THERE....WHAT IS THE ISSUE???? DOES ANYONE HAVE SOME ADVICE?? HAHAHA

HMMMMMM

g'mornin y'all......last nite mandy, tim and i were hangin out all evening. actually tim showed up on my door step wanting to cook italian food and that's where it started. u know ur not gonna turn down free food!!! so we finalized our big halloween plans.....and got started on the subject as to whether or not we believed in the super natural. mandy is a skeptic, which is probably the opinion of most ppl out there. but tim and i believe in all that shit, u have to believe when strange stuff happens when ur by urself......what the hell else could it b??? for example: tim went home thursday nite from all of us hangin together......he put his wallet and a set of car keys and a set of truck keys (both on seperate key chains) on a table, when he got up friday mornin the wallet was on top of the microwave, the truck keys were hangin on a nail by the door and his car keys were no where to b found, he scowered the place and couldnt find em, so he calls his buddy to make sure he hadnt left them there---no go, then he decides to check his coat pocket which was locked up inside the truck parked in the driveway.....there they r!!!! he knows for sure that he took both sets of keys out of his pants pocket and put them on the table........how do u explain that shit???? i live in an apt. where a friend of mine was murdered.......when i first moved in i didnt believe the stories ppl were tellin me until......i set up a wooden cd rack, put all my cds in it, for 3 NITES in a row i heard the damn thing falling over, id get up and come out into the living room to find my cds scattered all over the floor, id leave it there til mornin pick it all up and the rack would sit on the carpet perfectly until.....nite time, and it wasnt as if the rack just tipped over, the way the cds were scattered on the floor and how far they were spread out, it was as if someone had yanked on the rack........how do u explain it??? needless to say i got freaked out and had my apt. blessed, it would have been diff if the person who died here died of natural causes, but murder is violent and im not fuckin around with that!!!! but anyhoo, i thought id share this convo topic since halloween is comin up......lemme know what u think!

HALLOWEEN GET TOGETHER!!!!!

TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN (THAT MEANS U, U FUCKIN IDIOT!!!) OCTOBER 30TH WILL B OUR HALLOWEEN PARTY, IT'S MY FAV TIME OF THE YR B/C I GET GIFTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!...................................WAIT IVE JUST BEEN INFORMED, I DONT GET GIFTS, HOWEVER THERE WILL B ALCOLHOL, PIMPS, HO'S AND DRUNKEN DEBAUCHERY!!!!! PICTURES TO COME, NOT PICTURES OF CUM!!!! FORECAST @ 11............

Random thoughts..........

A memo to my adoring public-----i have nothing useful to say. i will NEVER EVER say anything important!!! i fully endorse canalbalism!!! there should b a holiday devoted to this. and on a seperate note, my ass is SOOOOO sore right now!!!! not b/c of freaky sex or working out....but sore b/c u slept on it weird or wrong!?!?! forecast @ 11............