My search is over!

I found him! Italked to my father on the phone this evening. I also got to talk to my grandparents too. I was excited and nervous. I found out that I have 3more sibblings. One is 11, 6, and 6months. I now have 5 brothers and sisters. That makes 6 of us. Everyone was excited to know what has been going on in my life. There has been so much time that has passed between us. He offered to send money so that I could come out there and see him over the holidays. I think I will go and see him over my christmas break or my spring break. I am so excited! I can't wait to him and my new sibblings and my grandparents. Well, thats it for now. I could talk for a long time.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!!

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! Have a good day full of food, love, and happiness. Best wishes and God Bless!!!!!!!

FUCK!

Fuck. FUCK FUCK FUCK. Piss Shit Fuck GodDamn it. FUCK. Holy what the FUCK, fuck. FUCK!!!!! Okay, I feel a little better. Sorry I yelled at you. Thank you, and Goodnite.

Begining my new Search! Part 2

Well, like I promised I would let you all in on the news. I had gotten my email that I had been waiting for. I have his last 8 known addresses with his current address on the top. I wrote him a letter today and I will have to mail it out tomorrow. Now, its just hurry up and wait. I gave him my address, my phone number, and my email address. I even told him a little bit about myself. I will tell him more of course when and if I get a response. Its like wondering aimlessly in the dark and I am searching franticly to find a light. Do I have to keep running into walls or will my light be discovered. Only time will tell. I will keep everyone posted in the times that come.

IN THE WORDS OF G...DAMN IT SHIT!

well i keep tryin to get some of the halloween pictures posted and its just not workin. pfft. fuckin blogger!! as if i dont have enough to piss me off already!! im not really angry about anything in particular. just time for an asshole day......which i do believe is goin to last longer than the previous 48 hours. woohoo! :D just in time for t-day, wont it b grand?? ;) it started tuesday evening while at work. a dietary aid was asking a nurse if she thought that being a blonde got her more "looks" versus now that shes a brunette. (the nurse, not the dietary lady) the nurse said maybe and then the dietary lady proceeds to say that back in her day she definitely got more looks as a blonde. then they both went inside. j and l were with me and i had to laugh....i said what a miserable old hag....she got looks my ass! j ofcourse said somethin about me being harsh. i said well if she were any more self absorbed she could b her own lesbian girlfriend. all she does is bitch and complain about everything. she rarely asks about anyone else, even when she does she soon cuts u off to listen to the sound of her own fuckin voice. then other ppl started gettin bitchy as the nite went on. so i decided not to sign up for any overtime that it would b best to take a couple of days to myself so as not to spread the asshole-ism.......what do i get??? my gas bill. which went from 30 to 250 bucks in one fuckin month. HOLY SHIT! needless to say there was a huge freak out and a string of profanities then calm. but u know what they say....theres always calm b4 the storm. hahaha i left the house then, went and paid the bills i planned on paying and window shopped at a few stores considering i still have a few xmas gifts to buy. but even that added to the fire....wtf am i doin window shoppin when i dont have the money to buy anything that i could potentially c for a gift??? so i came home feeling more defeated and stressed knowing id have to tell tim about the gas bill. wow! was that bad timing. he totally flipped the fuck out. even put in a call to the landlord. theyll b sending a guy over to check everything out on monday but still. at least now ive come to terms that i wont b the one finding the magical money tree in the back yard---i know ur back there damn it!! ;) in the mean time take a number and get in fuckin line! today is not ur day, tomorrow aint lookin so good either.........................................................

Begining a new Search!

I am begining a new search. Starting today. For those who know me, you know that I have not spoken with my father for about 12 years now. Today, I put out a search. I should have my results within 24 hours. I am really neverous about all of this. I have thought about doing this for a long time. What better times than the holidays to try and locate a lost family member. I will be in hopes that I find him and that I will be able to establish a relationship with him after all of these years. My father and I, the last time we spoke, had exchanged words. We, obviously, haven't spoken since. At a very young age I told him how I felt about things and it hit really close to home. I am sure that it upset him but I guess the truth hurts sometimes. I am not looking to appologize, I am just looking to know. To some of you this may sound very foolish and I can understand. However, when something just eats and eats at you, you eventually have to do something about it. I will keep everyone posted on the events ahead. Please, if you believe, keep me in your prayers!

YES DEAR-------

i know i posted just the other day but im feeling compelled to let everyone know that things have been a lil weird for me lately. its like something is off or outta whack and i cant figure out what it is. what a gnawing feeling. shitty actually. sorta makes ya feel crazy?? doesnt help that p keeps telling me that i look tired all this week at work. pfft. i am wore out....physically drained.

yes, i am getting pissed that i keep calling the estate atty to only reach the voicemail.
yes, i am pissed that when i leave messages, none of them r returned.
yes, im really hoping i get my moms stuff back at thanksgiving.
yes, i am sad that i have big news and cant share it with my mom.
yes, i am exhausted.
yes, i would like a drink. ;)
yes, i know i have one more atty payment....when i have it ill give it to u fucker.
yes, i am stressing too much about how many hours i work or dont work.
yes, i plan on vegging all weekend.
yes, my landlords suck balls and the lack of decency is disturbing to me....thats a whole other topic i could expand on........later
yes, i need to stop and catch my breath........................................being a grown up sucks!

Guys Rules!

Guys' RulesAt last a guy has taken the time to write this all down. Finally, the guys' side of the story.We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.1. Crying is blackmail.1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!Strong hints do not work!Obvious hints do not work!Just say it!1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.Don't ask us.1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.1. If we ask what is wrong and you say nothing,"we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is! just not worth the hassle.1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine ... Really.1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as sports, the weather, or hunting.1. You have enough clothes.1. You have too many shoes.1. I am in shape. Round is a shape.1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; but did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

ECHOOOOO

hey! doesnt anyone worry bout me??? lol, i tried posting a few days ago and the stupid page was taking waaaaay more time to load than i had patience. so here i am....

im a little surprised that no members of the ratpack have previously posted on the halloween party we had. needless to say it went off without a hitch....well there was an invite for a hitch but more on that later. ;) everyone showed up that was invited and the costumes were great. we made our way to the haunted house but freezing in line for an hour and an inoportune call of nature sent us back home just b4 the door. there were a few displays of stupid human tricks and many shots taken. pictures r still being processed.....i went to wally world to get them done today and the one hour photo was down. im not too pissed cause im getting free double prints out of the deal. :D and the little love connection i set up has worked out wonderfully. (go me!)

speakin of....i am inducting a new member to the rat pack. my friend L from work. ill have to get her email so i can make her a contributor on here.

theres plans for the traditional T-day dinner with our group. should b a good time. i love havin my friends over to just hang out with each other. :) the x didnt bring my stuff back in october, the new plan is for thanksgiving. any takers on how long i can hold my breath?? lol

work is work. i swear this time i will not sign up for any more 12hr shifts. i swear it. (yeah right, can we say holidays?) has anyone ever tried to put a condom on a soft penis?? its EXTREMELY difficult, especially when a resident keeps grabbing at ur hands and wrists. and no i wasnt doing anything dirty to an old man!! its called a texas catheter, or a condom catheter. yeah, condom on penis attatched to a drain hose to empty into a catheter bag. NOT FUN. ugh. what IS the fascination with grabbing urself? seriously. i promise it wont randomly fall off or walk away. it might b a magic stick........but its not that damn magical!

.....And Stick It Up Your Ass!!!!!!!!

So, I work in an automotive parts store, which company polices prevent me from saying the name of. Oh well. Anyways, today I'm helping a customer over the phone. He decides he'd like to purchase the new clutch for his car. He then proceeds to ramble off a series of numbers. I intrupt him to ask what the numbers are for. He tells me he is paying by credit card over the phone. I tell the dipshit that it's against company policy to do that, and if he'd like to come in and pay for it, I'd have the papers ready. He then tells me to "stick that clutch, up your ass!" then hangs up. So the point of this isn't to vent about some less than civil customer. I simply want to know what, in a fit of rage have you been told to stick up your ass? Or hell, what have you told other people to stick up theirs?