UPSET........

GRRRR......I AM TROUBLED AND I AM FEELING REALLY DOWN IN THE DUMPS. MAYBE ITS THE RAIN LATELY? I MISS MY MOM TERRIBLY. YESTERDAY I WAS WONDERING AROUND THE STORE TRYIN TO GET IDEAS FOR XMAS PRESENTS, HOPEFULLY TRYIN TO FIND SOMETHING TO BUY AND I COULDA JUST BAWLED MY EYES OUT RIGHT THERE. I SHOULD B HAPPY THAT SHES NOT SUFFERING ANYMORE AND I AM.....BUT I STILL MISS HER SO MUCH THAT I CAN HARDLY CATCH MY BREATH. I WALK AROUND WITH THIS GAPING HOLE IN MY HEART WONDERING IF IT WILL EVER START TO HEAL. I TRY TO DO WHAT I USUALLY DO IN MY LIFE CAUSE I KNOW MOM WOULDNT WANT IT ANY OTHER WAY BUT EVERYDAY THERE IS AT LEAST ONE THING THAT REMINDS ME OF HER. I KNOW I SHOULD B STRONG, IM NOT THE ONLY ONE THAT LOST HER. AND IM NOT SAYIN MY PAIN IS WORSE THAN MY BROTHERS---IM SURE HE FEELS IT TOO, ESPECIALLY NOW EVEN THOUGH NEITHER OF US R SAYING ANYTHING ABOUT IT. SO BUD, IF UR READING THIS.....I FEEL IT TOO AND IM SORRY AND IF U NEED ME U KNOW HOW TO GET ME. I HOPE EVERYONE CAN BARE WITH ME THRU THIS, IM A LIL OVER EMOTIONAL/SENSITIVE RIGHT NOW. I LOVE U GUYS SOOO MUCH AND IM SOOO GRATEFUL FOR ALL OF U BEING A PART OF MY LIFE. THANKS FOR BEING ALL THAT U R TO ME, I WOULD B LOST W/O U!!!